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Inside! Fresh Google search terms to confound Dubya and the FBI. Also: Is Bush a fascist?
By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Attention, all who are reading this column right now, please put down your drink and leap up off the couch and put your pants back on and log in to Google and type the words "hot bunny terrorist fluffer banana" into the comely and world-beloved Google search engine. Do it. Do it now.
Oh no wait, make it "Osama butt pancake lube explosives yay." Or better yet, try "homemade nuke porn lollipop kiddie nipple bomb!!!" (Be sure to include extra exclamation points because as we all know, Dubya isn't the brightest of presidents and these will add zing and personality to your entry and make your
search terms -- the very ones the Bush administration is right now subpoenaing the Google corporation to gain access to -- really stand out to the FBI and the Department of Justice, which are always in need of a little zing).
It shall be a mini-movement. It shall be called "Operation Screw With the DOJ and Make Lynne
Cheney Squirm." It shall be a big national gigglefest as we watch George W. Bush's gummint work to force and coerce the search engines of the nation to turn over their massive logs of search terms, all in an effort to see what perverted and criminal-minded people like you are really searching for, and sure you can defend yourself and claim it's pictures of Brangelina or recipes for blood orange/vodka body shots or just what the hell is wrong with Samuel Alito to make him look so wan and malicious, when we all know you're really looking for, of course, massive amounts of porn. And so are your kids…
BushCo's latest move against the citizenry is indeed a new and disturbing salvo, sending a shiver down the spine of civil rights proponents everywhere. Are you concerned? No?
Then try this: Simply couple this latest move with BushCo's outright love and defense of torture, along with Dubya's recent enthusiastic declaration that his team of flying monkeys has been secretly wiretapping whomever it wants in this nation for the past four years without any sort of warrant and, well, you've got yourself one hell of a big sticky taste of happy neofascism.
What, not enough? Fine. How about how Bush's insane rate of issuing those now-infamous "signing statements," those little firebombs of judicial misprision wherein your mumbling president gets to reserve for himself the right to ignore any law he signs -- yes, any law he desires: anti-torture, surveillance, you name it -- whenever he feels like it, if he deems that law
unconstitutional. Screw Congress. Screw the system of law. And screw, well, you…
Want to know if the government is spying on you?
Use www.FOIArequest.org to find out.
The Bush administration is trying to keep the details of its illegal domestic surveillance program under wraps, even refusing to say how many Americans they've eavesdropped on. Many Americans -- especially those with family and friends abroad -- are wondering whether government agents have been listening to their phone conversations or reading their email.
If you're worried this has happened to you, People For the American Way has created a new tool: www.FOIArequest.org
You can file a Freedom of Information Act request quickly, accurately, and easily.
We can't guarantee that the Bush administration will disclose all this information in compliance with the law, but we can help you through the process. By filing a FOIA request, you will send a strong signal that American citizens believe in the rule of law and aren't afraid to stand up to the President when he violates the Constitution!
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